2008 comes to a closer...

well hello there! its been waayy to0 long since i blogged! i dont know where to start! ...

well, for starters, christmas was yesterday! i must say, it was a great day! my aunt and uncle came over and yesterday morning, my aunt, uncle, sis, and set out on a longgg bike ride! and man, 20 miles worked my bootie! thehe, and we stopped at the usual place on the trail and fed the horses! we came home and talked and joked and laughed...the normal Brown Family favorites. then we ate ALOT...and drank...coke and water. ;) and pretty much had a jolly good time together as one big happy Brown Family! :) we decided this year presents were not necesary to a great christmas..however we all seem to break that rule. lol. i got a new projection alarm clock! yeah! and undies and a purse! woot! not to mention my trip to London coming up and my class ring! :D

while on that subject.... i leave for London on Sunday! I'm soooo excited! Setting out across sea to an unknown area of the world is sooo thrilling. It's going to be freezingg!!! and dang, i am not prepared for that, my warm floridian bootie in london. lmao. It will be amazingly fun nontheless, with the Bandos i love! ...and hot british men! :)

I got my SAT scores back a few days ago...not pretty. i was pretty upset at those damn results. i really thought i did better. no need to shed tears though over that, i will def be retaking that soon.


i washed and waxed my car today! it was soooo dirty! lol... inside and out! (backseat) lmao, thats for u BOOPER! lol! love u!

Things have been going pretty well these past few weeks! Family came over, great holiday break, going to London, MY COMPUTER IS FIXED(still in the process of downloading stuff), everybody is in good health, kasper is doing well, i decided to play waterpolo coming up soon, that is however, if i get the courage to wear the one piece and if it actually fits me. lol. but...2 things are missing. these 2 things are ALWAYS...ALWAYS on my mind. grades and another unmentionable problem.

Grades. Grades. Grades. this, so far, has not been a good year with grades. I really need to step it up. i have the end of this semester to trug through, then a new semester to begin with good grades hopefully. Ya know, this just crossed my mind...i am such an optimistic person, i actually think I'm going to do better next semester. wow, hold on, (sry, i think im talking to myself haha) i just challenged myself to do better...interesting...New years resolution? hmm...and the other item on mind...this is a hard one to talk about...well here goes...

I want a guy. A guy that will make me laugh. We would laugh together. A guy that smiles. A guy that is honest, respectful, and truthful. A guy that shares his emotions with me and i share mine. A guy that calls me, just to talk. A guy that will ride bikes with me and stop to share a smoothie. A guy thats adventurous. A guy that loves me. A guy that cares. A guy that holds my hand. A guy that dances with me in the pouring rain (and of course kiss me in the pouring rain!) A guy that loves my family and friends for who they are and i will love his. A guy who loves me for who i am. A guy thats with me through good times and bad. A guy that will stand by my side. A guy that will just sit with me and watch movies till we fall asleep. A guy that is crazy yet romantic. A guy that will plan a picnic or maybe even surprise me. A guy that will call me his girl. A guy that will love me. and not just any guy. This guy is out there. somewhere. Maybe we have met, maybe we will meet tommorow, maybe in college. I dont know. But I'm here waiting for you. :)

that took so much out of me you have no idea. so im sitting here tearing up. and i ask myself why? honestly, i dont know how to answer that. shouldnt i be concentrating on other things such as grades and what not? ...*sigh*...


now that thats all out of me... 2008 is coming to an end, 2009 is a few days away! I will be celebrating the new year in london! at a party! woot! 2009..so much to look forward to! but i wont forget 2008! through good and bad times...lets try to remember some things...i finished up ACL rehab! lol. failed my AP World test, finished school off fairly well, many parties to never forget! Summer in mexico was amazing. absolutely an unforgettable trip. junior year begins! powderpuff game! football games! hip surgery! band! vball! dances! parties! bonfires! ohhh my! there is sooo much more that happened! :)

have you ever given up something that was important to you? I've been contimplating this idea for awhile and i dont know what to do. Volleyball. I've played for six years and 2 years of club and absolutely love the sport. however, my downfall with the ACL surgery put me at a bad setback. i did come back and play this year, but it was really rough, no lie. I know i was rough, and it was hard on me. I gave up playing club season this year and im not sure whether to give up playing. Next year is senior year, i'd hate to quit before i graduate and not play my senior year. but then again, i'd have to go to camps this upcoming summer and try to gain some more strenght to play in the fall. I dont know. It kills me to think that i would "just not tryout". I love the sport. I dont know what to do damnit. asdfhaskdjwoirjasdf

anyways, this was really long...sry. lol. leaving for london in 64 hours! see ya'll later!

with much love and laughter. LB

seriously. seriously.

Now, were in like what the 21st century i think? lol. and we are surrounded by all this damn technology that washes our minds away in ciberspace and by little damn wires conected and a messy piece of .... sry for the anger, bit as you can see, MY COMPUTER CRASHED. and i lost everything f-ing thing saved on it and im soooooooooooooo pissed right now. so, im useing this old computer that sux ass. no joke. I dont have itunes, and use youtube till i download crap. facebook and myspace dont work. omg. im going to cry. seriously. this sux ass. something or someone or this damn computer is about to get punched or slammed into the tile. holy crap. so pissed.

Why cant we all just live like the cavemen did way back then. Life would be so much easier. (damn it, i cant type crap on this keyboard) But really, think about it...no technology, no troubles, no shit to deal with...just yourself, and a cave. how lovely would that be. Lauren and a cave. maybe some berries too. :) and perhaps nobody around. just me and myself and the cave. ..yea okay now im going crazy..

But seriously. this is ridicilous.

on another note...

randomly, as i was walking to lunch and to my locker today, i was walking and pretty much just thinking, as always...about Boopers book "Dateable". and i had some interesting thoughts come to mind...being that right now im pretty confused, but besides that deal, the point is, i remember somthing in the book stating that you wont stay together in highschool so why bother dating or something on that note... and why i feel some of that is false, alot of it is true. then again, i look at it like, im in highschool, should i not just be focusing on academics? well, i should me focused on academics, but im not. my mind drifts away frequently. and when yea think about it, everyone dreams about finding that man in there life, a mystery thats taking way to long to solve. Or in a guys veiwpoint, i guess he waiting for that woman to come along. or i mean, if ya swing differently than those two options than so be it, as long as ones happy in life i dont care who you love. but as we were discussing in psych today, "would u take the love or the money" Love is life. Live life loving happily. cant beat it. money wont cut it. yeah, in the long run, money is america, cant prosper w/o it, but Love, thats something that facinates me. When will it happen? is he out there? does he know me? do i know him? when will we meet? is he wondering the same things i am?

Life is all a mystery. Waiting to be unsolved as life unvails itself till death and beyond. Wonders of my mind flow curiously through the day, longing for the day i solve pieces and bits of this gigantic mystery. And the mystery isnt just "love". well, okay, most of it is...but what about career wise. What will i do? where will i go to college? what will i do in life? what will i pursue? where will i go? all these questions race through my mind daily as well as many other questions. when? where? why? what? how?

Life is a mystery. and im still yet to unsolve it. Honestly, i cant wait.for the future. im very optimistic. and while i should be concentrating on the present times, i can admit im not that focused. maybe i should change that up a bit. but for now, im 17, a junior in highschool. i cant wait to unsolve this mystery.

and while most are reading this, if anyone actually made it this far, lol, sry it may not have made all that much sense. hehe ;)
with much love and laughter, LB